It all started out so innocently (cue video montage of me running through a field of wildflowers in the morning dew). I was drawn to the packaging and the quaint "apothecary approach" to skincare. Plus, every interview in every magazine and blog raved about their products, and, well, the collective beauty consciousness was right about Embryolisse, so why not about Kiehl's?
Well, I still can't understand why people rave about them. The only explanation I can think of is that maybe some things were reformulated after L'Oreal bought them in 2000, and the "indie magic" is now gone from the brand. Their most famous product, the Creme De Corps, felt just like my $3 Palmer's. The Panthenol Protein Moisturizing Face Cream sat on my face and never soaked in, leaving my skin just as dry as before once I'd washed it off. My hair was coarse and strawlike - everything but silky - no matter how many different ways I tried applying Heat-Protective Silk Straightening Cream. The overpowering rotten eucalyptus smell of the Ultimate Strength Hand Salve made me die a little inside. And as for this body butter, it too has a fatal flaw.
At first glance, it looked really promising. The whipped texture isn't something we see too often, and promised to bring heavy-duty moisturization without the heaviness of some traditional body butters. The design is to die for and it even smelled expensive: warm and sophisticated, like coconut milk. And indeed, when I use this on my hands and feet, it leaves them feeling luxuriously velvety. The problem comes whenever I try to apply it anywhere else, like you would expect to do with a, yanno, BODY butter. No matter the condition, level of moisture, or temperature of my skin (yeah, I tested!), it starts balling up the second it hits my body. Seriously, it's disgusting to see and feel little yellow linty things rolling around on your skin. And frankly, it's unacceptable for any product but for especially one this expensive.